Why we needed the day off.
A few weeks ago, following the release of the video featuring George Floyd’s murder, I started to read that companies were offering their black employees the day off.
Within hours, within black spaces (if you know, you know), there were memes, jokes and verbal eyerolls related to the text/email/phone check-ins that started to roll in. “Are you ok?”, “How are you holding up?” and “Do you need to talk?” were familiar refrains that friends, classmates and black people I’ve never met were hearing from their colleagues and associates.
News Flash: black folks didn’t start dealing with their blackness a few weeks ago.
George Floyd’s murder at the hands of a police officer was horrible. But it was also not new.
The fact that it took four days of public pressure before that officer was arrested was questionable. But it was also unsurprising.
A key part of the black experience means having lowered expectations (if any at all) about the fairness with which you, personally, or others of your community will be treated by the government and society at large.
So what’s confounding and frustrating is the check-ins.
The global awakening around the black experience happened outside of the black community. We were already familiar with our own experience.
So while you may have taken a step back in horror at what blacks encounter daily, a check-in is a reminder that you weren’t paying attention in the first place. A check-in also puts the onus on us to become vulnerable when we already are. A check-in does nothing to dismantle the system that has put us in the state that has motivated you to check in on us.
Instead of checking in on us, check in with the manager who consistently overlooks the black colleague of yours or inequitably favors your work (SEE: cede power). Instead of checking in on us, check in with your father, mother or partner who damns the protests in the same breath as saying “back the blue.” Instead of checking in on us, check in on your bank account because last time I checked, black businesses continue to be underfunded by the government, banking institutions and investors.
In the end, we did need a day off. A day off from the check-ins.
